The holiday season is fast approaching. It’s hard to stick to a consistent schedule with special holiday programs at school, family gatherings and parties.
So, whether this is your first holiday season post-divorce or you’ve gone through this a few times already, here are some tips to get you through the fa-la-las and ho-ho-ho’s without too much turmoil with your ex-spouse.
1. Plan early
The sooner you plan, the better. Use a shared digital calendar or a parenting app and add holiday school programs and get-togethers with extended family. Remember to add those November and December birthdays as well. They tend to get overlooked, and you may find yourself scrambling to buy a gift amid everyone else’s holiday shopping.
2. School breaks
Where will your children be spending their days while on winter break? You and your ex will need to figure out childcare arrangements or if you plan to take any time off from work.
3. Embrace flexibility
Children indeed need routine and predictability. However, the holidays require a little bit of flexibility. Surprise visits from out-of-town friends and family, impromptu sledding parties and last-minute shopping for a class party means that co-parents may need to compromise and relax the schedule.
4. Discuss a holiday budget
It’s common for parents to feel guilty about the divorce and buy too many presents. Or, one partner may want to show they’re the better parent by giving extravagant gifts. Take some time to talk with your ex and set a gift-giving budget. If there are some big-ticket items on your child’s wish list, such as a new computer or gaming system, consider making it a gift from both parents.
These are just a few tips for navigating the holiday season with your co-parent. The most important thing is keeping the focus on your children. For them, this is a magical time of the year. Years from now, they won’t remember the gifts under the tree. They will remember how they felt, the fun things they did and their parents’ love.
